vasta
join:2003-04-07
Orlando, FL
| Jury Duty again
I made a topic sometime in 2007 when I got my first summons (I'm amazed it has been over 2 years) I lucked out that time and didn't have to go because I was not required...I don't think I asked this question so I will this time...I feel like I won't be so lucky this time so if I do have to go downtown, What are some surefire ways of not being selected for a jury? Because I could give a rats ass, I have better things to do like watch TV and play video games
I know about saying I believe in the death penalty, I hear calling the judge an asshole works but also lands you in jail for a few days + fines so I probably wont be calling anyone an asshole...
What are the odds of my services not being required a second time? I think my number (not sure if that has anything to do with it) last time was ~1200, It is 673 this time
Maybe after I call the number tomorrow (finding out I need to go down there) I can just drench my shirt or pants in lighter fluid, Go out back and act like I'm burning leaves or something and just slightly burn myself requiring a short stay in the hospital
I wish I would've committed a felony when I turned 18 or something but unfortunately I went through my years with the cops before I turned 18
Who knows, Maybe some very sorry person will rob my house tonight or tomorrow night, Surely I could use that as an excuse... |
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seaquake
Premium,MVM
join:2001-03-23
Millersville, MD
clubs:   | If you end up having to report, just tell the truth when you are interviewed as a prospective juror. With an attitude like you mention above, I think there's a good chance you'd be dismissed. |
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John Galt
Forward, March
Premium
join:2004-09-30
Happy Camp
 ·CenturyLink
| reply to vasta
Tell them you believe in 'jury nullification'.
»fija.org/
You won't be serving. 
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Remember, Tuesday is Soylent Green Day.
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John Galt
Forward, March
Premium
join:2004-09-30
Happy Camp
·CenturyLink
| reply to vasta
Unless, of course, you get the opportunity to burn witches...
»www.youtube.com/watch?v=yp_l5ntikaU
--
Remember, Tuesday is Soylent Green Day.
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LittlePiggie
Eat Me
Premium
join:2009-09-11 | reply to vasta
59 and never served! Called once and tossed within an hours time!
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PrntRhd
join:2004-11-03
Fairfield, CA
 ·Comcast
·Comcast Formerly ..
| reply to vasta
If you express an actual enthusiasm for serving on a jury and declare "I know I can be fair", it is likely the lawyers for either side will toss you off the jury because they won't believe you will be fair.
Or find out what the case is going to be about and declare you are personally too emotional to sit on that particular case. They will remand you to the jury room for reassignment to another case but you are unlikely to be pressed into service since you will not even be in the other courtrooms to be questioned or called. |
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gregz
join:2009-10-01
1 edit | reply to vasta
I have only been called up once, and since then I have been permanently excused from being called for any and all future jury pools. Do your duty as a U.S. voting citizen and show up. The worst they could do, is send you home afterwards. |
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tcope
Premium
join:2003-05-07
Sandy, UT
·Comcast
| reply to vasta
I had to go once. I did not prepare myself for the shear boredom of sitting in a school chair for hours on end looking at a wall. After 4 hours I left for lunch and never went back. I could not afford to loose so much money at work to sit in a room of 100 people of which, only 20 or so would be needed. |
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psafux
VIP
join:2005-11-10
| reply to vasta
if the case you are being called for was in the paper, tell them you read the article and already formed an opinion. (you may want to read the article so you know something about it in case the judge feels you are lying)
Defense will toss you out in a heartbeat, as they will not take the chance on not being able to sway your opinion.
plus its not something anyone can prove.
Alternatively, you could tell them you believe the police, in general, are corrupt. You will get tossed. And again, its not provable.
If you can find a way you know the defendant, that will get you tossed.
if you lie to the court and they find out you lied, that will get you tossed, too, but in a different way. |
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jack b
Gone Fishing
Premium,MVM
join:2000-09-08
Cape Cod
clubs:
·Comcast
| reply to vasta
If it's a criminal case, just say the defendant is guilty.
After all, if the cops arrested him, then he MUST be guilty!
If it's a civil case, just say you hate lawyers.
Gone in 60 seconds.
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runnoft
Premium
join:2003-10-14
Deerfield, IL
·Comcast
| reply to vasta
Here was one that didn't work:
"I'm a professional psychic so I would know who is guilty even before the trial." [Reported in "Juror Excuses: Creativity Reigns" by Scott Goldstein, New Jersey Law Journal, 7 February 2000, p. 1]. |
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ViviTheMage
vivi
Premium
join:2002-10-28
Minneapolis, MN
clubs:
1 edit | reply to vasta
In our county..when you go, you stay for the 7am-4pm shift (for the full two weeks - or was it one week, I forgot...), whether you are selected or not, to go actually be on a jury.
I was on one, it was kind of fun, was able to convict this dude of 14 counts of failure to abide by his restraining order from his ex wife I think it was...i was 18 at the time...weeks after turning 18 i got my letter.
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Bobcat
It's the groundhog's fault
Premium
join:2001-02-04
Bedminster, NJ
·Verizon Online DSL
| reply to vasta
It's not so bad where I live. You show up in the morning, hang out, get a 2+ hour lunch, then come back in the afternoon for 2 hours. The environment is nicer than where I work, my employer makes up the difference in my pay, and the commute is much shorter. What's not to like? I even picked-up a girl once. |
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lordpuffer
I Was Very Drunk At The Time
Premium
join:2004-09-19
West Hollywood, CA
 ·T-Mobile US
·RoadRunner Cable
 ·Vonage
·AT&T Yahoo
| reply to vasta
You could get picked to serve on a civil case, which is hard to get out of. I'm not sure how it works in FL. Does your summons mean only for a criminal matter?
I just got one too the other day. I used to work in prosecution and criminal investigation as an Attorney, so I am not likely to serve on a criminal matter. However, I could get picked on some boring civil case......arrrrrggggg
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UCLA Only On A Clear Day-Class of '81 |
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graysonf
Premium,MVM
join:1999-07-16
Fort Lauderdale, FL | reply to vasta
I get called for county court jury duty every three years, like clockwork.
One way to no longer be called is to surrender your Florida driver license and/or Florida ID card. That's where they get the names for the jury duty summonses. |
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camaro92
join:2008-04-05
Westfield, MA
·Comcast
| reply to vasta
Well when i was under 18 i did some dumb stuff and had a few infractions we will call them and i was never convicted just continued without a finding,and the week i turned 18 they sent me a notice and i just finished up with the courts and told them that,now i am 29 and have never been called back,seems they don't want people who actually know how the system works on a jury. |
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hahah
@applsys.com | reply to vasta
Tell them you would be perfect for a jury cause you can tell by looking at someone if they are guilty or not. |
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Eat Me
join:2002-09-25
Sussex, NJ | reply to vasta
I wish I would be called up for Jury duty... seems nothing happens in my little town!
When I lived in NYC I would get questionnaires every so often. In Jersey I haven't heard a thing. |
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Coma
almost resurrected
Premium
join:2001-12-30
Nirvana-Land
clubs:
| reply to vasta
said by vasta  :What are some surefire ways of not being selected for a jury?
You obviously don't remember my November 15, 2007 post on the same subject.
said by Coma :To Whom It May Concern: I am requesting exemption from jury duty based on the fact that I have organic frontal lobe brain damage as a result of a gun shot wound to the head in 1964. That trumatic injury left me with the resulting personality disorders associated with a pre-frontal lobotomy. These personality disorders include reduced concentration and attention, bad judgement, impaired insight, disinhibition, loss of social graces and sexual indiscretions, among others. Documentation of organic frontal lobe brain damage is available on request. Sincerely
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. . . seeking professional help . . . |
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Sweet Witch
Be the flame, not the moth.
Premium,MVM
join:2003-07-15
Gallifrey
·Comcast
| reply to vasta
I've been called twice, in two states. The first time I was #69 and got sent home at noon. The second time I don't remember my number but I was called to a courtroom for a final choice. We sat in a little room for an hour, then into the courtroom enmasse to listen to the case, then back into the little room until we were called individually. While in the courtroom I figeted in the seat and when I was called I handed over a ten year old note saying that I had two degenerated lumbars. The judge remembered me figeting (honestly in pain) and I was out of there in a few minutes after that.
The judge asked if there was anyway I could sit comfortably, I told him only with a lay-z-boy He laughed and I was on my way.
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"While you can teach an old dog new tricks, you simply can't teach him to be a cat."
"Are you my Mummy?" |
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